Manti Pageant - checkmark for the bucket list

Last month our family was invited to go up to Manti, Utah with my sister's family. Our families had a nice day together (mostly together) with the younger kids going to the pool with me and my sister's family, and Darren taking Jeremy, Cami, and Joey to the Manti temple for sessions and baptisms, respectively. Later that night we had a great meal together at Aunt Pearl Owen's home, and then all of us, and my parents as well, went together to the Manti Pageant.

The pageant is performed on the side of the big hill the beautiful Manti temple sits upon and the lawn below is filled to capacity with chairs for the crowds who flock to the pageant each year. I've wanted to attend this pageant since I was a little girl reading about it in The Friend.

I saw photos of Lamanite battles being portrayed on the hill and Moroni hiding the gold plates, and I wanted so badly to see it in person. I remember how older teens would often talk about going on their "super-activities" to Manti for the Pageant and all the fun they had. Even my own husband tells our kids of going to Manti with the youth from his ward back then. I looked forward anxiously for my turn to go.

Unfortunately, I never did get to go as a kid with my family, or with the youth in our ward. Around the same time I turned old enough to join Mutual, the bishop of our ward started enforcing a policy of "no super-activities," insisting we do only simple activities close to home, and inexpensive. Other wards continued to send their youth away on big fun trips (as evidenced by the big pictorals of white water rafting, etc. in the NEW ERA), but not our ward. Even other wards in our own stake didn't always strictly uphold the policy. (Example Numero Uno is my husband's home ward!) But in my ward our bishop was quite valient and firm in his decision about that policy, "regardless of what others wards do." No amount of pleading did any good to change his mind. I was pretty disappointed. It didn't help any that the bishop was my DAD!

So my turn to see the Manti Pageant finally came Friday, June 25th, 2010. My initial reaction upon arriving was simply, "wow." That was just in reference to the enormous crowd! I've been so fortunate in the past couple of years to get to see other pageants put on by the Church in various parts of the country, (Mesa, AZ, Nauvoo, IL, & Palmyra, NY) but this by far was the largest we

had been to. There were so many like-minded people gathered in that one place, it was really amazing. We did go on a busy Friday night - but even then, it was huge! We later heard 18,000 people were there on that particular night. Even more amazing you might think, we managed to get great seats - right in the center, and quite close to the front.

Afterwards I reflected on that pageant and the others we've seen. I recalled sitting in the audience at the Hill Comorah Pageant waiting until it was dark enough for the show to

start and thinking how it was a very long time

dream-come-true of mine to be at the Hill

Comorah. That was another place I'd wanted to go to since the time I was very young and I marveled at the time that my husband had brought me there finally and helped that dream come true. Ironically I hadn't even thought about it for years until I was actually sitting there. Seeing the Manti pageant was another childhood wish come true.

Could there be other childhood wishes in the back of my mind, still waiting to be realized? Surely if I had current goals I'd be working on a ways to make them happen. But even though the Manti temple and pageant have been there all these many years, it was my brother-in-law's invitation that was the catalyst that got us to go, and not some long-time burning desire on my part.

And there are the dreams you believe impossible, so you set them aside and don't even try to see them come true. As a young girl I always wished to be married in the Manti temple. When the time came and I didn't even bring it up, thinking, "None of his family or mine would want to travel so far..." I didn't ask. A month earlier I had walked through the newly renovated temple, and even knowing how beautiful it was, I didn't bother to say anything to the one person who mattered most - my future husband. Unbeknownst to me at that time, he would have agreed and helped make it happen! A dream unexpressed became a lost opportunity.

So I can't help but wonder what else there is to do in my life that subconsciously I've always had a wish to do. What are the other wishes made a long time ago, and over time and life somewhat set aside and not dwelled upon, which perhaps don't come to mind easily when making that list of "Things I want to do..."? Because I do believe that those dreams and goals that are expressed verbally or written down, have a far greater chance of coming to fruition. I do have to say, however, that although some dreams lie forgotten and don't occupy the forefront of our minds and to-do lists, the accomplishment of them is still very sweet.

The Sound of Musicals

There's something about having a blog that gives me guilt about not posting in it. Oddly enough, the rarely used journal in my drawer doesn't have the same effect on me. Ahh well... it's time.

I've been busy lately, which is nice for me. I mean, I can be busy almost all the time, but I'm not necessarily accomplishing anything. For example - busy... reading; busy... playing computer games; etc. And there's always housework and mother-work, but that's pretty routine for everyone whether they're swamped with work, home with a three year old, or just being a wife and mom. So when I talk about it being nice to be busy, it's because the reason is out of the ordinary.

I've been costuming for Fiddler on the Roof, our SLHS musical that's coming up the end of April. It's been such a joy. I laugh as I say that because although it's absolutely true, anyone watching or listening to Starr and I moan and groan over all we have to do probably wouldn't believe me. It's definitely overwhelming at times. We walk into the costume room and see mounds and mounds of cloths and cloth and "stuff" and sometimes just want to pull our hair out. But a large drink from Sonic and a little organization put us back on track and we're ready to go again.

So why do I love it? I love musicals. I love working with Starr Nicholas. I love the teenagers involved and working with them. I love being working for an activity my kids are involved in. I love costuming. I LOVE SHOW BIZ! (The former were not listed in any particular prioritized order.) The best dates I've been on were to Phantom with my husband, and Wicked with my daughter. The BEST!!

I've been listening to the soundtracks from musicals since I was young. I knew and loved all the songs to The Sound of Music long before I got to actually watch the movie. (And I have to add - I was even named after a character on that movie!) We didn't have television for many years, and the great musicals had all been in the theater long before I was alive, but my parents had a Sound of Music record I loved listening to. Finally, one summer it was brought back to the theaters and I got to actually see it. Twice! (LOVED it - naturally!) For a later birthday my parents gave me an 8-track tape of Fiddler on the Roof. Again, it was a long time before I actually got to see it, but by then I knew and loved the music well. My Dad, while a teacher in the Clay Springs Elementary school, put on several plays with the kids. As a 6th grader I got the part of the witch in Hansel and Gretel and loved it! I also remember helping him with the music when they put on Tom Sawyer and Peter Pan. During my Jr. High years I got to see Music Man and Oklahoma performed in the Show Low auditorium. I started collecting the piano music to these and others. Finally during my senior year of High School I too had the opportunity to perform and sing in the musical, Oliver! It was one - if not the highlight of the year for me. The acting bug got me. To this day I still wish I could get up on the stage and act and sing in every other musical I've worked on. Unfortunately the time for me to play Liesl (or even Maria) has long past, but who knows...maybe someday my time will come again.

I can't say enough about Starr. She is about the best friend a woman could have - in happy times and sad. I'm so grateful to know her. I'd talked to her about plays she was working on for years. As my little kids started growing up and giving me more ability to do other things, I asked to help her in the next play coming up. The previous play, Music Man, had not had her costuming expertise and we'd somehow made it without her, but having Starr at the helm of the Beauty & the Beast ship

was of dire importance. She accepted my help and kindly made me one of her right hands...(or left?) for B&B. I did my best to be an asset rather than a liability and must have managed that okay because she's put me to work in the next play Crazy for You, and now Fiddler. We've had so much fun together, deciding what worked, what didn't, and

making hundreds of custumes. It's been so much work, but so rewarding. This year I've felt like more of a partner than a lowly assistant and that's been great too. The turning point for me was one day when she asked my opinion, and I lazily said, "Oh, whatever you like best." She responded, "I know, but I wanted your opinion." I snapped out of it and realized, yeah - she did want my opinion, and more often than not - she took my opinion as well. It often coincided with the way she felt;

she just wanted to be sure. Since then I've felt far more confident in stating opinions and making decisions on my own and she helped give me that confidence.

As far as the kids go, I just love 'em! Who says teenagers are awful?! They're wrong. I love teenagers. Mine...and the others as well. They have their moody or bratty moments, but don't we all. Generally they're so much fun to be around. It's hard not to want to hang out with them. (Of course they don't want me to...) I've been able to get to know so many of the kids at school who otherwise I would not have even met. And they're really great kids. Of course I adore my own as well, and relish the time I've been able to spend working in their environment.

My husband gave a family home evening yesterday at my parent's home about being happy. He laughed telling me it was directed at me. I glared back. No...not really. I laughed too - because I knew he meant it. (Dangit!) Sometimes... okay, a lot of time... I do have a hard time being happy and finding joy. Darren used a talk by Richard G. Scott. One of the points made in it was that keeping busy is a good way to be happy and not have time to dwell on those things that are bothering us. I believe this is so true. I think we do spend more time feeling sorry for ourselves when we're not actively moving and/or doing something to help others. It's obvious to others too, as my family can tell the difference in my general attitude. My house is an absolute disaster area. My bedroom has clothes all over the place and I'm not sure where the laundry room countertop went to. My kitchen table is covered with the fabrics and trims of Jewish prayer shawls, daughter dresses, and men's caps. My diet consists of Dr. Pepper and more Dr. Pepper. (So no "diet" involved there...) But - the sound of music...er...I mean, Fiddler is heard around my home, and I'm happy about it.

Worry

I'm a worrier. I wish that was a typo and I could say I was a warrior. No, it's the first unfortunately, but I don't want to be and have actually strived hard over the years not to be. But when things aren't going well, and people are upset, and it's out of your control, sometimes it's very hard not to worry.

There's been many times when our financial situation was so bad I would just worry myself sick over it. I wouldn't be able to sleep, and when I was unconscious my dreams were full of the same worries so it didn't feel like I got any rest. My husband is not worrier and always says, "What good does it do?" He'd then be proactive, go to work, and do something about the problem. His being able to act on a problem instead of just dwelling on it helped him cope so much better than I did, sitting home and worrying.

I've come to see how action is helpful for any number of trials, problems, situations that crop up in our lives. If I'm feeling like crap, but I write a note to someone else feeling that way - we both end up feeling better, and so forth. The trick is coming out of yourself and your own problems long enough to see what others are feeling - and that's not always easy either. Self-centeredness comes natural to me; you might say it's one of my talents... haha! (That was a joke.)

Anyway, what about those situations that really are out of your control - beyond anyone's control? What then? My wonderful Sunday School teacher mentioned a phrase in a talk by Richard G. Scott in his lesson one Sunday, so I looked it up to read the entire article. He said to keep perspective.

"When you have done all that you can reasonably do, rest the burden in the hands of the Lord.

When I take a small pebble and place it directly in front of my eye, it takes on the appearance of a mighty boulder. It is all I can see. It becomes all-consuming—like the problems of a loved one that affect our lives every waking moment. When the things you realistically can do to help are done, leave the matter in the hands of the Lord and worry no more. Do not feel guilty because you cannot do more. Do not waste your energy on useless worry. The Lord will take the pebble that fills your vision and cast it down among the challenges you will face in your eternal progress. It will then be seen in perspective. In time, you will feel impressions and know how to give further help. You will find more peace and happiness, will not neglect others that need you, and will be able to give greater help because of that eternal perspective." -Ensign, May 1988

Setting aside those worries and problems we have, and leaving it in the hands of the Lord is probably the hardest thing for me to do. But what is there? A good friend tried to tell me more than once a while back that everything was already in God's hands; it was just up to us to let go, accept that, and trust completely in Him. If that's true, - and I'm not saying it isn't - why is it so hard to do that? To trust completely? To accept that whatever comes is His will?

Part of the reason I like that quote so well is in the last sentence. It helps remind me that I am needed by others - family and friends alike, and focusing on worries and concerns in my own life prevents me from seeing and doing things for them.

My thoughts these days are concerning a member of my family who is really going through a tough trial. But I'm not only afraid for what faces this person, but for all the other members of the family involved as well. Unfortunately, that's about everyone because they are all worried sick about this person too. So now I'm concerned about them too. Someone close just described the situation to me as our Haiti - our family earthquake, and I can see the comparison easily, as the foundations are trembling and family ties are being strained to the breaking point. But this is one of those times that the situation is beyond any of our abilities to control or arrange the outcome. All we can do is pray for our relative(s), hope our family will be strong and able to stand against this quake, and then go on and take care of the people in our lives. So that's what I'm going to try to do.

We have a Date!

I got an email from Jonny yesterday evening. He's been on his mission in Thailand since July 2008. Well, he had news of his return; the date has been set as July 23rd. Woohoo! Bummer.

Now why the mixed emotions you might ask. I'll say it's because I'm a mom who has missed her son and was looking forward to seeing him again around the first of the month - not the end! Darren and Jeffrey, on the other hand, are happy for Jonny getting an extra three or so weeks. I guess they understand better how a guy might like as much time as he can get in the field and may or may not be looking forward to coming home as much as his mother is looking forward to it. I know Jeffrey didn't want his mission to end, and my husband has been home from his mission for over twenty-eight years and he's still unhappy with the decision that cut his mission short from two years to eighteen months.

That's not a bad thing though - to love your mission enough to want to stay on it. It's just that there's a time and a season for everything. And as I tried to tell Jeffrey, he'd completed as honorable mission like the Lord asked of him and now it was time for him to go on with his life, do other things, and progress in other ways. Jonny will also. The bottom line is that we do have a date for when he is coming home, and I'm so happy about that. (It helps us make our own plans too.)

I've really missed Jonny. In the past we've teased him for his tendency to talk a lot and draw out a story far longer than necessary - taking forever to get to the main point. But I've missed that too, and I'm looking forward to letting him talk to us and tell us whatever he will with as much time as it takes him. And although I don't make it a practice to count the months, weeks, or days - I'll make an exception just today... one, two, three, four, five, SIX months until I see him again! Yay!

New blog, same hobbies, new methods!

I started a blog previously with the intention of sharing some of our fun travels as well as practicing my writing skills once again. I had a hard time doing both. The posting of photos seemed to take over the writing aspects. So I figured out if I separate them I might have some better success in working at my goals. And as it's a new year, a new decade - that's always a good thing to do, right?

I've been having some fun scrapping on my computer for the past couple weeks. Here's some of what I've been up to...

Having said that (and posted these) I will keep the other blog more for showing off Darren's photos and such, while using this one for my own musings, bragging, whining, and all those other things one does in a blog from time to time.

Because, after all, I might intend to write terribly interesting and witty dialogue in every

single post, but now experience has taught me that I'm not as good a writer, as witty, as happy, and full of great ideas as I thought I might be. And sometimes ( okay - a lot of times) I have rotten days. I'm normal, right? So by admitting it maybe I can get over that perfectionist hump and just talk about what's on my mind.

Lately, that has been my computer photobooking. My husband Darren tried to get me to switch over from the paper, glue, and media type scrapbooking years ago and I wouldn't do it, insisting that l loved how cute I do make my own pages, etc. I just couldn't be less interested. But I tried one...and then another...using a website with predesigned pages and layouts. It was so easy and actually a lot of fun. The main thing though was that I loved the result - a beautiful, thin, hardbound book with our photos displayed exactly how I'd laid them out. So...I got hooked. Don't you just hate it when you have to admit your husband was right?!

Since then I've learned new techniques and new programs that are helping me "Scrapbook" my photos in the old style but all digitally. And while I no longer visit any scrapbook stores I've discovered a whole new world of digital stores and "freebies!" I've already accumulated lots of great artwork to use and unlike regular stickers and paper it's all reusable! I could go on, but I'll take pity on you and stop there. Suffice it to say, I'm enjoying my hobby again after a few years of doing nothing and that's exciting to me. It helps me look forward to the year as well take more notice of what's going on around me and with my family - which is always a good thing.