There's been many times when our financial situation was so bad I would just worry myself sick over it. I wouldn't be able to sleep, and when I was unconscious my dreams were full of the same worries so it didn't feel like I got any rest. My husband is not worrier and always says, "What good does it do?" He'd then be proactive, go to work, and do something about the problem. His being able to act on a problem instead of just dwelling on it helped him cope so much better than I did, sitting home and worrying.
I've come to see how action is helpful for any number of trials, problems, situations that crop up in our lives. If I'm feeling like crap, but I write a note to someone else feeling that way - we both end up feeling better, and so forth. The trick is coming out of yourself and your own problems long enough to see what others are feeling - and that's not always easy either. Self-centeredness comes natural to me; you might say it's one of my talents... haha! (That was a joke.)
Anyway, what about those situations that really are out of your control - beyond anyone's control? What then? My wonderful Sunday School teacher mentioned a phrase in a talk by Richard G. Scott in his lesson one Sunday, so I looked it up to read the entire article. He said to keep perspective.
"When you have done all that you can reasonably do, rest the burden in the hands of the Lord.When I take a small pebble and place it directly in front of my eye, it takes on the appearance of a mighty boulder. It is all I can see. It becomes all-consuming—like the problems of a loved one that affect our lives every waking moment. When the things you realistically can do to help are done, leave the matter in the hands of the Lord and worry no more. Do not feel guilty because you cannot do more. Do not waste your energy on useless worry. The Lord will take the pebble that fills your vision and cast it down among the challenges you will face in your eternal progress. It will then be seen in perspective. In time, you will feel impressions and know how to give further help. You will find more peace and happiness, will not neglect others that need you, and will be able to give greater help because of that eternal perspective." -Ensign, May 1988
Setting aside those worries and problems we have, and leaving it in the hands of the Lord is probably the hardest thing for me to do. But what is there? A good friend tried to tell me more than once a while back that everything was already in God's hands; it was just up to us to let go, accept that, and trust completely in Him. If that's true, - and I'm not saying it isn't - why is it so hard to do that? To trust completely? To accept that whatever comes is His will?
Part of the reason I like that quote so well is in the last sentence. It helps remind me that I am needed by others - family and friends alike, and focusing on worries and concerns in my own life prevents me from seeing and doing things for them.
My thoughts these days are concerning a member of my family who is really going through a tough trial. But I'm not only afraid for what faces this person, but for all the other members of the family involved as well. Unfortunately, that's about everyone because they are all worried sick about this person too. So now I'm concerned about them too. Someone close just described the situation to me as our Haiti - our family earthquake, and I can see the comparison easily, as the foundations are trembling and family ties are being strained to the breaking point. But this is one of those times that the situation is beyond any of our abilities to control or arrange the outcome. All we can do is pray for our relative(s), hope our family will be strong and able to stand against this quake, and then go on and take care of the people in our lives. So that's what I'm going to try to do.
